Expect Nothing

I learned a couple things about expectations this year. The first one came to me when I was getting anxious about something I felt obligated to do, but in reality I didn’t need to or have to, it was another persons expectation that was becoming my obligation, and when I really thought about it I realized that these situations usually end in disappointment. Why do we put ourselves through that?

Don’t let others expectations become your obligations which usually end in disappointments!

The other thing I learned about expectations kind of answers that last question, it was more recent and in connection to letting go of a couple people who have no place in my life anymore. I wanted to let go but at the same time I was still expecting something from them. Expecting them to change, expecting them to do the right thing, expecting them to put me first just once, but as long as I held onto those expectations, I couldn’t truly let go of them and all the baggage.

Don’t let your expectations of others keep you from letting go!!

We almost always have expectations of others don’t we? We expect them to act a certain way, believe a certain way, treat us a certain way. Like everything, expectations come in positives and negatives, what are you bringing to the table? Are you ready to let go? I know I am. I’ve had enough heartache attached to expectations and I can’t continue moving upward while holding on to the extra weight.

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Through the Park #metoohero

What a great night, on the way home there’s a little bit of moon light. Time with friends, no cares in the world, what a fun adventure, but that’s not how this night would end.

Danger, Danger ahead, he looks like a giant and wants the grass to be our bed. The alcohol is what I smelled, I don’t know what I yelled. Unwanted kisses, pinned on the ground, would  anyone hear my sounds.

Many parts are not clear, was I frozen? was I fighting? DOES IT MATTER? welcome to my life of fear. His name was Bart and he was well liked, but he had no right. Why do men think they do? why do men look at you?

I heard a voice yell STOP but he was still atop. Tracy Derr an angel for sure came running up and he knew how to get tuff. He pushed Bart off, we watched him stumble away. In that moment a connection was made, one of love for another that swept the fear away. We never spoke of that night again, and though our paths didn’t cross much we are forever friends.

Today I walked through that park with my headphones on to not hear the crunch of the leaves on the ground. Feel what you feel, know what you know, and let it all go.